A couple was discussing the holiday festivities their family would enjoy. They mentioned a large gathering they would attend, and remembered they would once again hear Uncle Henry’s stale stories, repeated at every holiday meal. At this recollection, they raised their eyebrows and rolled their eyes.
The holidays often bring us into closer proximity with these “irregular” folks. There’s Aunt Agnes who notices when you've gained a few pounds and points it out loudly for all to hear. There’s Cousin Calvin, who serves up his extreme political views with the broccoli. And then there’s Niece Natalie, a sullen teen who stares daggers at all the adults seated around the table.
Families are made up of an unlikely menagerie of human beings whose failings stick out like sore thumbs when they gather. But as you look around the table, at those you adore and those you barely tolerate, consider this: When the chips are down, each person in this circle would step in front of a train for you. If you were kidnapped, Uncle Henry would forget his old stories long enough to cash out his retirement fund to raise your ransom. Aunt Agnes would disregard how many pounds you gained to donate a kidney if you needed one.
Cousin Calvin may be politically intolerant, but he’d pick you up on the roadside in the middle of the night if your car broke down. And that angry Niece Natalie? She’ll encourage your children through their own sullen teen years, assuring them that their parents are pretty great, after all.
This rag-tag band is your Phone-a-Friend List. These are the people who’ll step up when you need help. You can count their resources among your own.
Sharp edges often clash when it comes to time together with our friends, neighbors and family members. And yet their commitment to us holds high value. We’re enriched by their resources even as we’re irritated by their sometimes-difficult behavior.
This year when you gather with family and friends, look around the table and really see the people with whom you share your celebration. Consider each member of your group and all that he contributes. And when it’s time to give gifts, give them the gift of your tenderness.
