I remember one night, six years ago, my brother Davion went to take a shower. When he went into the bathroom, he had long dreadlocks extending past his shoulders. Davion started his loc journey to be more like his dad and at this point, he'd had locs for five years.
An hour later, he walked out of the bathroom, his locs gone.
When I saw him, I noticed all of his uneven cuts. Years of patience down the drain, but why? He told us that he felt like when people see him, they only see his hair. If he didn't have a retwist, he was seen as unkept and dirty. With his hair down, he was seen as a gangster and a thug.
I was too young to realize: This is what being black in America is.
Four years later, I've started my own loc journey to have hair like my brother’s, and I've started to see his point. Whenever there's some important event, I'm expected to have my hair done because it “looks neater.” When people say this, it shows that they don't know my culture – and they aren't trying to know it either. Locs are supposed to grow out; they aren't supposed to be kept done. It creates hair thinning.
So, I wonder if when people see me, are they only seeing an unkempt black girl?
One night, on my way home from my job, I got pulled over. I was scared because I was all alone on a side street still in my hospital scrubs. I know I hadn't broken any laws, so why was I pulled over? The white female officer told me I was pulled over that night because when I turned, I looked suspicious – simply because of my skin and appearance.
Am I suspicious walking into my Advanced Placement classes? How about when I walk across the stage to get recognition for all of my hard work in school? It's hard to fathom that my hair and skin color can shrink me as a person and all of my accomplishments.
My brother is studying in college to be an anesthesiologist and serving our country. He's still the same person that was looked at like a thug because of his hair.
I believe that people are more than what you see. At school, I'm the highest-achieving person of color in the top five of my class. I also have high aspirations to be a surgeon. One of my favorite things to do is join random clubs or sports. I do this because I want to pad my resume but also because I don't want to be predictable. By that I mean when people see a black girl with dreadlocks, they don't see a softball or golf player, they see basketball or track. Not to say there's anything wrong with those sports, I just don't play them.
I believe that in order to truly get to know someone, questions need to be asked.
