Antoni

Aug 16, 2019

Queer Eye's food and wine expert Antoni Porowski returns to the stage to play a multiple choice game about one of his favorite dog breeds, corgis.

Heard on Antoni Porowski: Queer Eye For The Quiz Guy.

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OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Before the final round, let's bring back our special guest to play another game. Please welcome back, from "Queer Eye," Antoni Porowski.

(APPLAUSE)

ANTONI POROWSKI: Thank you for having me.

EISENBERG: And let's bring out our guest announcer Cecil Baldwin.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Antoni, we know you love corgis.

POROWSKI: I sure do.

EISENBERG: So for our listeners who aren't dog people, Welsh corgis are those tiny little dogs with little legs, perky ears and cute butts, and they are just all-over adorable.

POROWSKI: Yep.

EISENBERG: However, on Page 26 of your cookbook, you are pictured walking a dog that is clearly not a corgi.

(LAUGHTER)

POROWSKI: That dog is Kuma. Kuma is a rescue.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I'm a rescue, Antoni. I'm a rescue.

POROWSKI: Because...

CECIL BALDWIN: Adopt, don't shop.

POROWSKI: ...Pit mixes have a really bad rap.

EISENBERG: It's true. They do. Nobody wants to adopt them because they're scary.

POROWSKI: Nobody wants to adopt them, and they're everywhere.

EISENBERG: Yeah. So basically, our producer used your love of corgis as an excuse to Google corgi photos all day.

POROWSKI: Oh. Sign me up for that job.

EISENBERG: And then we wrote this multiple-choice quiz for you. So this is multiple choice.

POROWSKI: OK.

EISENBERG: Here's your first question. Welsh corgis were originally bred for what practical purpose? A - to serve as small watchdogs for small homes...

(LAUGHTER)

POROWSKI: Cute, but no.

EISENBERG: ...B - to herd cattle; or C - just to look super, super cute.

POROWSKI: B.

EISENBERG: That is right. Corgis are close to the ground.

(APPLAUSE)

POROWSKI: They nip.

EISENBERG: They nip at cows.

POROWSKI: They nip at the ankles.

EISENBERG: Yes, the cows' ankles.

POROWSKI: Yeah.

EISENBERG: How annoying. And then they run between the legs.

POROWSKI: Yes. They're very fast.

(LAUGHTER)

POROWSKI: And when they run really fast, they can't go straight because they're so long, so they go to an angle.

(LAUGHTER)

POROWSKI: It's true. Yeah.

EISENBERG: What event in Southern California attracts more than 1,000 corgis and their owners? A - Bring Your Corgi to the Symphony at Hollywood Bowl; B - Corgi Beach Day, officially hosted by a corgi named Mr. Pickles; C - Lowrider Remakes, an outdoor short film festival featuring iconic movie scenes reenacted with corgi actors.

(LAUGHTER)

POROWSKI: I did not know that Mr. Pickles ran the thing, but it's the Corgi Beach Day.

EISENBERG: It is the Corgi Beach Day.

(APPLAUSE)

POROWSKI: They wear bathing suits.

(LAUGHTER)

POROWSKI: They are so adorable. They love a beach.

(LAUGHTER)

BALDWIN: In England, more than 30 corgis have lived with the royal family in Buckingham Palace. Which of these royal corgi incidents actually occurred? A - at a state dinner, a corgi stole a sausage from Camilla Bowles; B - in the 1950s, a corgi bit a man who was the palace's royal clock winder; or C - during the Queen's annual televised Christmas message, a corgi could be seen peeing in the background.

POROWSKI: I think that it's the clock winder.

BALDWIN: That's correct.

POROWSKI: Yes.

BALDWIN: Yeah.

(APPLAUSE)

POROWSKI: Her corgis wouldn't be like that; they're way too respectful. But now all the corgis are gone. Not to take it to a dark place, but...

EISENBERG: I know. Now they have dorgis.

POROWSKI: Are they dachshund-corgi mixes?

EISENBERG: Yes.

POROWSKI: So the reason why I love corgis so much, even though I didn't have access to them as a child, is because I was raised with miniature dachshund, even though we called them dash hounds (ph). And so we always had either one or we had two. And the first one was named Biggie (ph), and she was smuggled from Poland. And we think that her name was Mickey (ph), but my grandmother didn't know how to pronounce it, so she called her Biggie.

And she couldn't eat dog food because they didn't have dog food post-communism in Poland, so she would eat All-Bran, ham, cottage cheese. And when she was really old and started having heart palpitations, she loved having English breakfast tea. But we used to water it down. And I made it way too concentrated, and she almost died, like, three times.

(LAUGHTER)

POROWSKI: And then she did die one time when my parents were driving me back from junior high. And we were carpooling in our red Mercury Villager minivan, and all the other kids wanted to stop for chocolate bars, but I didn't want to because I could tell that my parents were sad.

And we got out of the car, and both my parents got emotional, even my father, who does not cry, except he does now in his older age. It's really cute and very endearing. And then we got emotional, and we ended up burying Biggie behind - but I got to, like, feel her one last time. And she was, like, a really important part of the family.

EISENBERG: I don't know if we can do any more show.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: But you did great, Antoni. You did actually amazing. Antoni's upcoming cookbook is called "Antoni In The Kitchen." "Queer Eye" Season 4 is streaming on Netflix. Antoni Porowski, everybody.

(APPLAUSE)

POROWSKI: Thank you so much.

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